> You called in sick yesterday and went to the beach with your buddies? I'm glad you did! We all need a mental health day once in a while. Being happy actually makes you more productive in the long term.
Not quite. It's great when employees take care of themselves and make a point to enjoy their time outside of the office.
However, it's not really cool if you commit to be somewhere on a certain day, no-show, and then lie about being sick.
If you want to take a day off, that's perfectly fine. Please just communicate about it honestly. Don't lie. Reputation and trust are hard to build but easy to destroy.
Also keep your coworkers in mind in these situations. It's rare that engineering work exists in a vacuum without connections to other people's work. If your team mates have to fill in the gaps because you disappeared for a day without warning, that's not really great for the rest of the team.
> However, it's not really cool if you commit to be somewhere on a certain day, no-show, and then lie about being sick. If you want to take a day off, that's perfectly fine. Please just communicate about it honestly. Don't lie. Reputation and trust are hard to build but easy to destroy.
People sometimes take "sick" days because the culture is such that they aren't allowed to be more honest about it. Many places I've worked operate in a never-ending cycle of extreme urgency. Taking days off usually must be approved far in advance, making it useless for those times when you wake up and simply cannot be productive. This leads to burnout pretty quickly. I have no issue with saying "I'm not feeling well" when I know I've hit a wall mentally and need to separate myself from my work. This makes me much more productive for the weeks following.
In Europe, calling in sick when you're not actually, recognizably ill is a pretty serious breach of trust. No cutesy "mental health break" exceptions. That said, you likely have at least 20 days of paid vacation, plus holidays.
In the US, where 10 days paid vacation is the norm and you're often punished in some way for actually taking it, the occasional "mental health break" of calling in sick is winked at.
A company I work with was recently acquired by a US company (I'm British). I was quite confused when, in a meeting, all of the Americans suggested that the company should implement mental health days several times a month. My thought was: isn't that what the weekends and holidays are for? It would be quite unusual for British employees to demand mental health days. Perhaps the lack of paid vacation explains the difference (Although, I haven't had a full week off since 2014 because I'm a freelancer, so maybe they have a point).
I can assure you there is nothing "cutesy" about mental health. Feeling severely depressed/suicidal is much more serious than some minor cold. Thank god the US is moving in the direction where mental health is recognized as a serious issue. Comments like this show that we still have a long way to go.
> I can assure you there is nothing "cutesy" about mental health
You misread what I wrote, and then got angry about what you imagined I wrote. Usually I don't explain myself to strangers on the internet, since people who angrily misread also usually angrily double down, but here goes.
In the US, it is frowned upon to take a scheduled day off just to relax, outside of your annual 2 weeks of vacation. So you call in "sick". Since you're not really sick, but want to relax, you call your reason for illness a "mental health day". I characterized this practice as cutesy, because it's a cutsey repurpose of the concept of sick day for self-care. It's not a mental health crisis, it's relaxing. But as long as you characterize it that way, it gets a nod and a wink from anyone who cares.
In Europe, by contrast, if you need time off because work is stressful, you plan ahead, take the day off and be cheerfully honest that you spent the day at the beach or whatever. But if you tell people you were sick, and then spend the day at the beach, people will at best think you are odd, but probably will think you're a liar. Telling people it was a "mental health break" to call in sick in order to go to the beach will not get the same cozy reception it gets in the US.
Apologize for misreading you and getting frustrated. I appreciate the explanation. I hope you can understand where I am coming from.
If I am anxious or depressed, going outside into nature or to the beach would help me tremendously. Much more so than sitting at home. How anxious and depressed do I have to be before it flips from "relaxing" to "legit"?
At my job I get x vacation days and y sick days. If I feel I unwell mentally I am going to use a sick day. Why is it anyone's business why I am sick or what I did on my sick day?
If my coworker said they were feeling terrible yesterday so they took the day off to go to the beach I would understand and encourage that. I would also admire them being brave enough to admit that rather than pretend they had a virus.
Oh yeah absolutely feeling that. 2 weeks of vacation for years on end has done that to me. Planning on interviewing and trying to get a start date as far out as I can. (maybe 3 months or even 6 months if they are ok with that).
I agree, confidentlake. You should be able to take time off of work to relax if you need. And, if the only outlet the US culture allows is to call in sick, then there's nothing wrong with doing that!
Slight tangent, I've been seeing a lot of companies from the US advertising remote roles in the UK and advertising "20 days paid vaccation + public holidays" as one of their "amazing benefits". I often wonder if they realise it's a legal entitlement over here and not seen as all that amazing.
I agree, my last role was 25+ public holidays. They also offered holiday trading, which is a real "benefit" that should be advertised in my eyes. That allowed me to go up to 30 days annual leave + public holidays which was great. Current job is setup as unlimited with a minimum of 20 + public holidays, all in all I take about the same as I did at my last place but it's a bit less hassle to track.
Advertising 20 days + public holidays in the UK is basically advertising that you give people the minimum the law will let you.
Uh, or you have allotted hours that you can use and will use? My boss isn’t my mother, they don’t need to know the “real” reason why I’m calling in sick.
So far the companies I've worked at don't have "vacation" or "sick" days, they have "paid time off" (which is really great if you're healthy and really shitty if you're not).
Not quite. It's great when employees take care of themselves and make a point to enjoy their time outside of the office.
However, it's not really cool if you commit to be somewhere on a certain day, no-show, and then lie about being sick.
If you want to take a day off, that's perfectly fine. Please just communicate about it honestly. Don't lie. Reputation and trust are hard to build but easy to destroy.
Also keep your coworkers in mind in these situations. It's rare that engineering work exists in a vacuum without connections to other people's work. If your team mates have to fill in the gaps because you disappeared for a day without warning, that's not really great for the rest of the team.