“Enjoying life has nothing to do with what you have, it has to do with who you are hanging out with”.
Umm, I can't agree with that. You need a new mentor, Max.
Enjoying life indeed has nothing to do with what you have. It also has nothing to do with who you go get drunk with.
Enjoying life has to do with who you are, and what your perspective on life is. Some people enjoy solitudes, others enjoy being with close friends, others enjoy being adored by infinite crowds. Some people are happy sitting alone on a grassy hill with half a penny in their pockets, others are miserable even as millionaires surrounded by the best and cleverest people in the world.
There is a lot of evidence that Happiness is much like IQ in that you are born with a basic peak and while it can be dragged down there is little that can rise it. For the most part, outside of extraordinary circumstances it's fairly constant over your lifetime.
PS: And yes this means there are probably people in the middle of a 20 year prison sentence that are on average happier than you are.
According to studies cited by Sonjy Lyubomirsky (http://www.faculty.ucr.edu/~sonja/ ) in her Book "The how of happiness" (a happiness book from a scientific view), the genetic predisposition is about 50%. 10% is your environment, and the rest is what you do with your life.
So, there is room for improvement for most people, although not as much as some happiness-gurus may like them to think.
> Enjoying life indeed has nothing to do with what you have
Obviously you have enough food and shelter, or you would be singing a somewhat different tune.
It's hard to enjoy yourself and be happy when you are truly hungry, or cold and wet in the night.
Of course you can be happy with less than luxurious housing, or sub-par food, but have you ever felt the stab of hunger, the wrenching pain in your stomach, not that wimpy little ache you get after 12 hours of fasting?
Enjoying life has something to do with what you have.
Over the past few years, just hanging out on HN, I've read a lot about happiness and pleasure. I've even had some great books recommended by fellow HN'ers (latest one is the science of pleasure. Great read so far! http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0393066320?ie=UTF8&tag=...) And none of it tracks with your blog entry.
One of the interesting things that has happened in the last decade or so has been a serious study at just what happiness and pleasure really is. I wish I could give some trite answer, but the real answers are much more interesting. Things like experiences beat possessions, or the great beauty of essentialism. In all of that reading, I've never read anything that jived with your blog post.
I think I'm getting the happy bit. The more interesting bit is whether or not people are made to be unhappy. I'm not so sure total happiness is a good thing. (which sounds really strange, huh?)
Wow, thanks. I had sometimes chatted with Max Klein on Twitter. It's quite a weird feeling to realize that he doesn't actually exist (almost Hollywodish).
Does that mean all business, relocation and other stories are fiction?
I think it should be read as a parable, not a true story.
I think Max, who- or whatever he really is, once stated he's consciously creating some kind of online persona? No idea what he intends to achieve, though.
So the 'successful business' which sprang from nowhere over the past year doesn't actually exist? The whole 'relocate to China to save a few bucks' craziness didn't really happen?
That would explain a lot, as this emerging story reads more like a fictional dot.com tale.
Edit: Thanks PRS. I won't be wasting time with 'Max Klein' posts in the future.
The mentor in the story is most likely many different people or the man Max Klein would like to be in his life. If they are many different people, he just rolled them all into one for story telling.
I can't see how someone who purposefully picks fights could be considered a valuable mentor though.
I sat at the top of the tower in hong kong and looked out over the bay. The bed I sat on was expensive, the writing pad on the desk was made of heavy expensive paper.
Newsflash: Unhappy people are not made happy simply by having more money.
If you don't enjoy life, you're doing it wrong. The secret isn't any material thing. It isn't 'who you hang out with'. It's who you are. If you don't like life, change yourself until you do. Learn to enjoy things, instead of simply using them. Learn to enjoy accomplishments, instead of using them as goals on your way to happiness.
I hope we aren't supposed to believe this was a real story, either. Unhappy people don't turn around in 1 night. You can't show someone that other people are happy and have them wake up the next morning realizing how to be happy themselves. You have to work at it, and realize that the unhappiness is you and the only way to change it is to change yourself.
I enjoyed reading this, as it is a nice story, but wccrawford has a point. Happiness is internal, not external. It's a choice and a habit, not a situation.
If you're feeling unhappy even when successful that means, there are issues you need to work on, could be childhood trauma, child abuse, etc.
I went through the same thing and could not figure out why I w as feeling like shit when I was making tons of money.
Ultimately found the reason.
Started going to a ---> --Gestalt-- Psychologist therapist, It's been over a year and it has changed my life enormously. Discovered I had resentment against my parents for many many reasons, worked on that and feel happier than ever.
No. The reason why you might be unhappy although successful is because success has nothing to do with happiness.
I'm happy you worked your issues out, but you might have been just as happy doing the therapy first. In fact, maybe you would not have chosen a "tons of money" job.
Umm, I can't agree with that. You need a new mentor, Max.
Enjoying life indeed has nothing to do with what you have. It also has nothing to do with who you go get drunk with.
Enjoying life has to do with who you are, and what your perspective on life is. Some people enjoy solitudes, others enjoy being with close friends, others enjoy being adored by infinite crowds. Some people are happy sitting alone on a grassy hill with half a penny in their pockets, others are miserable even as millionaires surrounded by the best and cleverest people in the world.
Happiness comes from inside, not outside.